


Falling

by bjfic_archivist



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Canon, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-05-14
Updated: 2004-05-14
Packaged: 2018-12-27 09:20:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12078180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bjfic_archivist/pseuds/bjfic_archivist
Summary: Justin is always falling.





	Falling

**Author's Note:**

> Note from IrishCaelan, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Brian_Justin_Fanfiction_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in September 2017. I posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Brian/Justin Fanfiction Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/bjfic/profile).

Sometimes it takes a minute for your body to realize its falling. Then you just feel like it's slow motion. Like it's not really you and it's not really happening. Of course, it was me and it was happening because I couldn't keep without tripping like Brian couldn't go without fucking. I'm always falling. So I took about two steps into the diner noticed the slippery when wet sign, and then went on to prove its validity. I'm glad I couldn't see me fall. I was embarrassed enough as it was. Then SMACK slow mo came to an abrupt end along with my fall. Apparently someone up there thinks that I need to be burdened with all the head trauma of the world because the first thing to hit the lovely rainbow tiles of the Liberty Diner floor was, of course, my head. All this to come pick up a measly check.

 

I opened my eyes to a worried Deb hovering over me. Emmett was rambling about how this happened once to his Uncle Horace and how he had amnesia for four days. I realized the fall must have knocked me out. Great. I could feel someone's gentle hands behind my head pillowing it from the hard tiles. Michael. I would have smiled if I could have cleared my mind enough to do it. He's a sweet guy we're all lucky to have him as a friend. Even if we play enemies we really are good friends. Most of the time. My eyes scanned the growing circle of queers that had come to my rescue. Deb was yelling in my ear asking if I could hear her, and I responded with some smart ass comment about how I would be able to hear her if I was dead. She hit me! Talk about a mother's love.

She declared I must be alright if I could make smart ass comments and the crowd cleared away. Then I saw him. Just standing there looking at me. For some reason it pissed me off. Maybe because I was embarrassed he saw me fall, but really I know it's because he didn't run to my side and fear for my life. Asshole. I sat up leaning slightly against Michael listening to Debbie command Brian to take me home and make sure I was alright.

"Nice job boy wonder." He teased. I rolled my eyes and felt the awful head ache coming to life from the back of my skull.

Damn it. "Fuck you." I growled off handedly as his hands went under my arm pits to lift me up. I wobbled a little, and then felt stronger arms wrap around me from the front. I couldn't help but lean into the strong grip knowing who it belonged to. Even if he should have been down on the floor worried that I had a concussion.

 

"Nice job, Sunshine." It's not hard to realize Brian and Michael are almost brothers. I figured the same comment would apply.

 

"Fuck you, Brian it hurts." I was angry again, and embarrassed and was burying my head into his chest to hide from anyone who was laughing at my misfortune... it could have been any of them I wanted to say.

"C'mon. We'll go back to the loft and I'll make it all better." He whispered.

 

"I can't I have a head ache."

I could feel his smirk. He grabbed my check for me and we went to the Corvette. My head was throbbing, it was raining, classes ran too long, and I was pissy. "You could have acted a little concerned." I growled closing my eyes against the throbbing. He was quiet. "Hello?"

 

"What did you want me to do? Deb had it under control. You fell."

 

"Well it would have been nice to open my eyes and see you there instead of Deb and her neon "jack off" tee shirt."

 

"You're right it probably is better to come back to consciousness looking at me."

 

I glared at him. "Fine."

 

"What do you want me to say?"

 

"I don't want you to say anything I want you to care a little when I'm laying on the fucking ground..." Ok . . . big oops. Did I just completely forget who had to hold onto my bloody limp body waiting for an ambulance to come put me back together?

 

"Maybe once was enough." He mumbled staring ahead. "Hey, I'm sorry that was stupid, but still . . . I like to see you worry a little instead of teasing me for falling" I scoffed gently to myself. "It was pretty dumb though."

 

"You're cute when you're clumsy." He teased gently, and I could hear the affection in this voice. I nearly swooned at the sound of it. He reached out gingerly and gently pushed my head forward. My neck was stiffening up. He touched the bump and I saw his face change. Ok so he was showing things. Why did I keep telling him I accepted his different ways if I never let him use them? I guess I just wanted him to show something. Pent up emotion isn't good for the body, and I loved and love him too much to see him stress so bad his heart explodes. I knew he cared. I just wanted some emotion. I opened my eyes slightly. "You tired?" He asked.

"I'm always tired."

 

He rolled his eyes.

 

"Ok yes I'm tired. Very tired." I was so sore I didn't even notice for a few minutes that we weren't going to the loft. "Where are we going?"

"Place neither of us want to go."

 

I shot up immediately. Ok I really don't think anyone can blame me for this huge terrifying fear of hospitals. Too much time in them. Too many bad memories. "Brian I'm fine it's just a bump on the head."

 

"You have a concussion."

 

"So you've had them before ice it... wake me up if I fall asleep."

 

He shook his head just as we pulled into the hospital. No no no no! "Brian please." I whispered as he parked the car. "Please." He pulled his lips into his mouth staring forward, and amidst my fear I felt awful. He was worried or he wouldn't have taken me to the one place he never wanted me to be in again. He wouldn't even get tested with me after the bashing. He just couldn't be there with me. I have a feeling it wasn't so easy without me there either. He pulled the arm rest up between us and I don't even remember doing it I just instantly clung to him. I couldn't place exactly why I was so afraid of the hospital. The bashing hadn't happened there and everyone had been really great to me. Just the pain I guess. So much pain and anger and missing Brian and never knowing if he would want to see me, or how he was. I closed my eyes.

 

"It's not the same. You'll walk in, and they'll check you out and you'll walk back out . . ." I heard a slightly shuddered breath and realized that Brian's emotions were catching in his throat. "Just better safe than sorry. Okay?" For some reason the fact that Brian was having such a hard time made it less frightening for me. Showing him I was ok was my priority.

 

"Ok. It's alright. It's good to be here for a slightly comical reason." I told pulling away and hopping out of the Vette my body instantly missed his arms, but was reunited rather quickly. Always there and wrapping me in an embrace. Why was I mad at him again? He let me lean against him as we walked in and I tried to steady my breathing. My eyes kept drooping as I felt the insatiable need to sleep. He was right. I had a concussion. Me and my fucking clumsiness. He walked me in arms wrapped around me and I remembered the homophobic nurses who often worked there. Luckily I was awake enough to demand he come in with me. And I did demand it. Twenty minutes later Brian stood beside me in the emergency room cubicle as I lay on the bed. My head was throbbing so loud in my ears I wanted to cry which, if you ask Brian, I do quite often. He, in a very non Brian way, was holding my hand and stroking my head. The portion that wasn't covered in a grapefruit sized lump.

 

The whole hospital threw him off whack. It really bothered him but once I got inside I was fine. This was defiantly better. I'd take slightly sore, but conscious and with Brian over nearly dead unconscious and without Brian any day. Though that is a given. I let my eyes slip closed again as the deep need for sleep called again. I knew I shouldn't but it just didn't matter in my slightly pain driven haze.

 

Brian's lips pressed to mine. "Eyes open." He scolded. I smiled slightly.

 

"I hurt." That was borderline whiney, but really when am I not a little whiney. He surprised me by smiling gently.

"Poor sunshine."

 

"No pity." I admonished.

 

He laughed out loud which if it wasn't so rare an occurrence I would have winced at it. He has a loud laugh. Instead I smiled. "Shut up. No pity my ass. I'm holding your hand and worrying over you and you love it. If you didn't have a fucking concussion you'd be all over me."

Why do I have thoughts if he's just going to read my mind? I smirked. I couldn't deny it so I pulled the Brian tactic and just didn't respond. "Well . . . fine then don't stop." He again just smiled and made soothing patterns in my hair. It really helped the pain. "Are they ever going to come in I just wanna go home."

 

Did he flinch? I hadn't called the loft home in a while. Even though I more or less lived there. Did he think I meant Daph's?

 

"We'll go home soon." Even better. Just then the doctor walked in. He was older, gray, and I almost laughed at the irony. It was my old Doctor. "Justin. Good to see you up and mostly at em." He said with a smile on his voice. He'd been great to me during my . . . extended stay.

 

"You too Dr. Craft." I chuckled.

 

"Now it says here you..."

 

"Failed at a new dance step." Brian teased but his voice wasn't hurtful. Sometimes I can be too sensitive, and I really do need to learn to take a joke. Especially the way I deal em out.

 

Dr. Craft chuckled. "Took a fall did you?"

 

"My day hasn't been great." I said smiling slightly. It was hard to keep up a nice conversation with your head feeling as though it were in a vice. Dr. Craft seemed to realize this.

"Probably don't feel like talking all that much. Could you sit up for me?"

 

Brian had to help me sit up. "Alright now I'm sure it's a little tender but I need to just. . ." He pressed slightly on the lump feeling for . . . whatever a doctor feels for and I squeezed Brian's hand hard at the pain. I didn't really want to cry out in pain as a 20 year old man. He squeezed back gently rubbing his thumb over the top of my hand. "Pretty good bump you got there, Justin."

 

"Could be worse." I said lightly even though I really knew how worse it could get.

 

"Very true." He said keeping the mood light. "Now I'm just going to shine an annoyingly bright light in your eyes to see how well your pupils dilate. How's your neck and back? Sore?"

 

I nodded. Very much so.

 

He smiled sympathetically. "It seems you've thrown yourself all out of whack. Well. You do have a mild concussion, and as you probably already determined a really sore back. We'll get you an ice pack ice it as much as you can, and we'll get you a couple pills of Vikadin for the first day when you'll be the most sore. Now, Mr . . ."

 

"Kinney." Brian supplied looking away from me to the doctor.

 

"Will you be with him the next 24 hours?"

 

Brian nodded mutely.

"Good. For the first five he needs to stay completely awake. You see how his pupils are dilated even in the light. When they react to the light again he'll be fine to sleep but only two hour periods."

 

This reminded me all too much of when my parents used to talk about me when I was in the room. I kept my mouth shut however since obviously he needed to tell Brian and obviously I couldn't wake myself up.

 

"Just wake him have him take a drink get him to talk a little so that you know he's really awake, and then he'll be fine for another two hours."

 

I groaned. What a pain in the ass. All I wanted to do was sleep. Brian nodded. "Could I have the Vikadin prescription, and is it cleared with his list of allergies?" He always remembers the allergies. He worries to death and won't let me take anything haven't passed by a doctor. I can't say as I blame him. We have Epi Pens around the loft for my newly discovered spider allergy. So allergies are big with Brian.

 

"It is. He hasn't had this type but he's had the generic version." Ok stop talking about me. Brian turned to me as if knowing I was annoyed.

 

"Alright. Ready to go home?"

 

"I've been ready since we got here." Dr. Craft shook my hand and left. Brian shrugged his jacket on and helped me stiffly put mine on. He smiled and kissed my forehead pulling me to him. "I told you I was fine."

 

"You're not fine you have a concussion."

 

"I recall a certain car accident and a man dancing in his loft."

 

"Yea well. I have to make sure. Mommy might kill me if she knew I wasn't taking care of you."

 

"Or maybe Brian's worried about his Sunshine?" I smirked, and he kissed the top of my head again. He always does it.

 

"Maybe a little." He whispered kissing the tip of my ear. I shivered at either the words or the kiss I don't know. A nurse walked in as he was hugging me and looked a little embarrassed. She was younger.

"Oh... um I just need Mr. Taylor's insurance." Fuck. I didn't have any means of insurance being too old to be covered by my mom's and my father wouldn't put me on his. I couldn't find any I could afford. I felt panicked suddenly at the aspect of being weighed down by the bills when Brian slid one hand out from around me took a card out of his wallet and handed it to the younger nurse. She thanked him and said something about returning it in a minute.

I looked at him confused. "What the hell? How do I go on your insurance? Do I get to play the nephew?"

 

"If you were my nephew I would have left you on the diner floor."

 

"Brian."

 

He rolled his eyes. "I put you on my insurance."

 

I couldn't help but grin. He wasn't going to tell me. I stared right in his eyes just so in love with him. "You love me don't you?" I whispered looking right in his eyes.

 

He scoffed. "Yea." I immediately took it as `yea right' and sighed. I just wanted to hear it once. He knew I knew. Why wouldn't he just say it? He pressed his lips to mine, and I was accepting that as the only answer I would get when he pulled back. "Yea. I love you." A grin spread across my face that I don't think even another fall on the floor could have wiped off. I leaned into him suddenly not able to trust my own knees. He loved me. Brian Kinney was in love with me. It took so much trust to tell me that. He believed in love now. He loved me. I loved him. I took a deep breath as if I was wafting the words into my body. `I love you.'

 

"I love you too." I whispered.

 

"I know, Sunshine."

 

And I fell for him all over again. I'm always falling.


End file.
